The Sagittan Chronicles: New Cover Design!

Over the course of the last year, I have done a lot of book selling. I've gone to Comic Cons, outdoor festivals, craft fairs, fundraisers, beekeeping events, book fairs, high schools, and elementary schools, just to name a few. And I've been paying attention to things people say, their thoughts, etc.

Now, I've thought for quite a while that I wanted to do a cover re-design for The Sagittan Chronicles, since I used multiple designers and they don't really look like a series. However, my experiences meeting and talking to actual readers has confirmed my suspicions. 

WW-Ed1-Cover
CW-Ed1-Cover
LW-Ed1-Cover

Here are a few things I noted about my original covers: 

  • People were immediately drawn to the Clock Winked. They liked the eye. But I got a lot of people who like literary fiction, mysteries, and thrillers, and fewer scifi fans (except at Cons, where everyone likes SciFi).
  • No one was interested in The Lonely Whelk until I explained the premise.
  • No one was interested in The Wounded World until I explained the premise.
  • People who profess to hate Scifi would still buy The Clock Winked, because they liked the cover and because they liked the idea of it being in a bookstore. I even had one lady who bought it for her elderly friend, even though I recommended she not, simply because it was set in a bookstore and she liked the cover.

At any rate, none of the books look like scifi (maybe Lonely Whelk a tiny bit, but not really) or YA, and none of them match. So I called up my friend J Zachary Pike, and he said he'd be willing to help out. So this is what we came up with:

WW-Edition2
CW-Edition2
LW-Edition2

The Clock Winked (which I sold out of first) is now available! You can get an updated version on Amazon. The Lonely Whelk will hopefully be up in the next week or two, and The Wounded World not too long after that. In addition, The Clock Winked will be on sale (and by "on sale" I mean FREE) starting on Friday, January 29th, until Wednesday, February 3rd. Then it will jump up to $2.99. Get a copy while you can :)

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Some Thoughts On Being Old (Which I Am Not)

Recently I read an article in which a professor suggested that our societal fear of aging is a self-fulfilling prophecy and that, in fact, those who live to the ripe old age of senior citizen are extraordinarily fortunate, despite aches and pains, loneliness, and fear of dying that everyone struggles with at some point. I personally have a few years to go until I would be considered old (although, ask a teenager and that perception might change), but I spend a good deal of time with octogenarians, septuagenarians, sexagenarians, quinquagenarians... you get the drift. I facilitate a senior writers group, I volunteer for an organization that serves a lot of seniors, and I spend a lot of time with my grandmother and other close people in my life who have considerable experience. So I think about these things a lot.

ariele+grandma

How long will it take me to get old? Some people age faster than others, mentally or physically. Will I be happy with the life I have led? Will I be okay with the majority of the decisions I have made? If I am poor, will I still find a way to be content with my life? If I am rich, will I find a way to share with those around me? What if I don't make it to the wonderful title of senior citizen? Will I still have made choices that had a positive impact on those around me?

I think that the answers to these questions are something that I could answer every day, and not just at the end of my life, whenever that may be. I think that what Professor Thomas suggests is true at any age: age and experience matter. They enrich our lives.

The first of my high school classmates died a couple of years ago in a terrible and sad boating accident. I had no idea how to react, couldn't make it to NY for the funeral, and didn't have a clue if I should do something or what. We learn to deal with these types of situations over time, of course, but I doubt it gets any easier. But I spent days afterwards, remembering how upbeat he always was, how he would bounce up to my locker and greet me in the mornings. I used to tell him he was so cheerful and bouncy, like a squirrel, and one year for Christmas he gave me a walnut.

His life was short, but he made a positive impact on me and many others, and he existence in time will never fade. His 24 years always was and always will have been. 

ariele+dad

I feel fortunate to have made it as far as I have, though I still may only be a vicenarian. And I think (right now, while I'm writing this -- I do have a tendency to change my mind) that it is important to be content now, whether I'm 27 or 87, to make decisions I can be proud of now, whether I'm 27 or 87, and focus on what good I can bring into the world. I want to feel fortunate every day, to appreciate the snow and the rain and the stubbed toes, and to look forward to my days of silver hair, arthritis, age, and experience.

In the meantime, I will keep spending time with my very favourite septuagenarians and octengenarians, and learn from their successes. I will write my own self-fulfilling prophecy.

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9 Things I Like About My New Office

I got an office! It's a new year and I felt that an office would be just the thing to help me be more productive. No more lazing about with the cats all morning. No more yelling at the cats in the middle of the day when they start attacking each other. No more having to hit CTRL-Z eight million times as Wilfred walks across my keyboard.

So, to celebrate, I've decided to list 9 things that I like about my new office.

9. The Hallway.

It has them. This is technically good enough for me, but in case you're bored by the hallways, let me explain that this building used to be a convent. Sometimes I imagine nuns walking up and down the hallways, feeling rather annoyed that their bedrooms are filled with computers and desks. Plus, look at it--it's straight out of a Scooby Doo episode!

Some of those offices are empty, so if you're looking for a spot...

Some of those offices are empty, so if you're looking for a spot...

8. My Door.

Now, you probably don't know this either, but there are no doors in my house. This means that when Wilfred wants to walk across my keyboard, he walks across my keyboard. When Goblin starts yowling at the sky or barking at the birds, I cannot block out the noise. In addition, most of the office spaces I looked at were in shared office spaces, meaning at most a cubicle, at least a desk that you could sit at for a few hours at time, and definitely no doors. 

This door is amazing, for while it does not block out all sound, it blocks out enough sound and no cats can get in. (Spoiler: there aren't actually any cats in the building.)

I can't really imagine a better number than 203A.

I can't really imagine a better number than 203A.

7. The Entryway.

This might seem like a silly thing to put on my list, but every time I walk through the entryway, I feel like: "I HAVE ARRIVED." It's official. I'm a grown up. And the weird size and shape of the office resonates perfectly with my slightly off-kilter personality. I just get excited every time I walk in.

It's a narrow entryway, but very welcoming.

It's a narrow entryway, but very welcoming.

6. My Desk.

Yes, I have desks at home. But this desk is special because I didn't have to pay extra for it! Whoever put this desk in here, built it in this room and it is too big to fit through the doorway, so they let me keep the furniture without charging me the extra furniture fee. This is awesome because it is a real desk, not an art desk or a tiny, tiny Target desk like the ones I have at home. It even has a filing drawer! And enough space for my computer, monitor, AND some papers!!!

Yes, my mouse pad says, "protected by aliens."

Yes, my mouse pad says, "protected by aliens."

5. My Windowsill.

I don't have windowsills at home big enough to put things on. So having one basically makes my day every day. In my future home, I will have ALL the windowsills. So it is super duper exciting to be able to actually USE the sill for something other than, well, silling the window.

I've got my little Baymax to take care of me if I get sick, too. :)

I've got my little Baymax to take care of me if I get sick, too. :)

4. My Plant.

Yes, once again, I have plants at home. In fact, this little plant sat right next to me in my living room too. But here, it is an OFFICE PLANT, which is so much more epic than just a regular plant. I still have not named the plant though at last check the popular vote was Groot. :)

I AM GROOT'S COUSIN.

I AM GROOT'S COUSIN.

3. The View.

Yes, there is a parking lot on the other side of the trees, but the fact that I even have a window, and the fact that there are trees outside the window thrills me to no end. I love watching the sign at the dry cleaners change. Last week it said, "You're Never Fully Dressed Without A Smile" (yes, I hope that's stuck in your head for days), and this week it says, "Do You Have A Coupon? Check Out Our Website."

The sign is the yellow blob back there.

The sign is the yellow blob back there.

2. The Weird Bathroom Sink. 

The bathrooms on this floor are a bit odd. There are two stalls, all covered with 70s-shade green tile. The sink is tiny and stuck back into the wall. I can't even fit my shoulders over it. There is a shower, too, but it doesn't look like it gets cleaned and there appear to be boxes stored in it.

Looks like something from a weird, uncomfortable basement. But it has hot water, so, yay.

Looks like something from a weird, uncomfortable basement. But it has hot water, so, yay.

1. The Ladder.

This is unique to my office. There is a ladder, and anyone who knows me very well knows that I am obsessed with ladders. This particular one leads to a trap door which leads to the roof and it is AMAZING. I can't tell you the number of times I've climbed on the roofs of buildings I definitely shouldn't have (ahem college dorm) and while I will resist the temptation here, I am pleased to note that, should the zombie apocalypse come, I have an escape route.

Isn't it gorgeous? I can't even stand it.

Isn't it gorgeous? I can't even stand it.

My office has everything else I need, too. High speed internet, full utilities, a parking lot, a dumpster, AND it's a 5 minute walk from my house. Maybe someday I'll give you a tour around the rest of and the outside of the building. Then, you can see the refridgerator where I keep my lunch, and the decorations in the bottom floor, and the PICNIC TABLES OUTSIDE! And all the pretty things I get to see on my way to work. 

SNEAK PEEK!

SNEAK PEEK!

Episode 2: The Pineapple Princess

Today I bring you part 2 of my Epic poem.: The Tupperware King. If you haven't already, you should start by reading Episode 1: The Tupperware King.

Once again, I offer no explanations or apologies. Enjoy or don't.

Episode 2: The Pineapple Princess

Have you heard of the Tupperware King?
Who hangs plastic buckets from the ceiling?
Across the river from the Pineapple Czar,
The two are close allies whether near or far. 

pineapple-owl

Both good rulers have issued one big behest
To rid their lands of the Tupperware Pest!
This demon, this devil, this plague on the land
Has given both kings many a ruined plan!

But the Tupperware Pest had a plan so mean
Neither king could’ve guessed what the future would bring.
So the Pineapple Czar was astounded one day,
To see that the Pest had stolen his Princess away.

pineapple-sponge-bob

The Pineapple Princess had been kidnapped that night
And she bravely bore the horrible flight
To the lair of the atrocious Tupperware Pest,
Where she would become his new treasure - his guest.

The Tupperware King was upset to find out
The that Princess next door was with the big lout,
So he sent the Tupperware Prince on a quest
To find the lost Princess and destroy the foul Pest.

dragon-knights-etc

The Tupperware Prince set out that same day
Riding north, though the Black Forest lay in his way.
He feared nothing but the Tupperware Pest,
But he had to defeat it and destroy its nest.

He reached the broad hillside, the home of its lair,
Looked around vainly, but the Princess wasn’t there.
He hoped and he hoped that some information he’d glean,
But the villainous Pest was nowhere to be seen.

Dismounting his steed, the Prince looked around
Wondering where the ill Pest could be found,
When suddenly his wandering eyes should behold,
A rare piece of tupperware hiding in the wold.

He tiptoed closer, eyes growing wide
As the treasure grew closer, soon his new prize.
A yellow-covered bin, with container and lid,
A worthy antique about to be his.

tupperware-yellow

Before he could pounce on this holiest grail,
The sky grew dark and he saw the great tail
Of the Tupperware Pest, aloft in the sky,
And he thought for a moment 'twas his turn to die.

The vilest beast in the kingdom dropped down
And picked up the Prince and his sword and his crown.
Flying away, held tight in its grip,
The Prince crossed his fingers, hoping he wouldn’t slip.

Not too long later, the Pest let him down
Roaring and laughing at catching two crowns.
Now the Pest had bargaining power to behold
To get from the kingdoms tupperware, fruit, and gold.

The Prince darted into the cave filled with fear,
And felt shame and surprise as the Princess drew near.
“Are you feeling okay?” asked the Pineapple Princess.
And the Prince nodded bravely, though he'd been dispossessed.

cat-pineapple-princess

The Prince apologized, “I’m sorry I got caught.
All of the work I put in for you was for naught.”
“Don’t you worry,” the Pineapple Princess advised.
“I’ve got a plan you’ll see with your own eyes.”

“No talking!” the Tupperware Pest loudly roared.
“But Tupperware Pest, we’re ever so bored!”
The Princess called back, her voice without fear,
And the Prince admired the gall of his peer.

“I don’t care if you’re bored - you’re my meal, you’re my feast!
Just wait til I’m ready to eat you at least!”
The Pineapple Princess grinned with glee
“My plan is working,” she whispered, “you'll see.”

“I don’t see,” the Tupperware Prince whispered back.
“How will it help if we’re his afternoon snack?”
“We won’t be,” the Pineapple Princess replied. 
“I have a plan - just be ready to ride!”

best-plan

For the next few hours she shredded her skirt
Into long strips that were covered with dirt.
She tied them together with her deft hands
While the Prince watched and wondered about her big plan.

Once she was finished she hid her creation
Behind some rocks in a peculiar formation.
Then she lit a fire and the cooking began
And the smells rose up from the boiling pan.

The Tupperware Prince sat right down to wait
While Pineapple Princess paced, paced, and paced. 
The sun went down and the sky grew black,
And the Princess said, “Time we lay down some whack.”

The Tupperware Prince felt his eyebrows raise
As the Princess called out, “Pest, are you ready to graze?”
“Is dinner served?” The Pest cackled out,
“What have you cooked that will please my snout?"

dog-cooking-meme

The Princess ran behind the crevice in the rocks
And gestured to the Prince that towards her he should walk.
The Tupperware Pest flew in with a roar
And the Prince flinched and waited to get eaten or gored.

Then the Princess shrieked and yelled loudly
Jumping out from behind the rocks rather proudly,
Landing smack on the back of the Tupperware Pest.
She wrapped her skirt rope around his tupperware chest.

"Climb on his back, my Tupperware Prince!" 
She called as the Pest roared, howled, and winced.
Holding tightly to her makeshift reins,
The Princess grinned as the Pest strained and strained.

The Prince climbed up and held on tight
And the Princess cried "Hyah!" and they rose into the night.
The Pest's great wings flapped as he roared
And high above the Tupperware Kingdom they soared. 

Not too long later they landed safely
In the courtyard of the Tupperware King bravely.
The Prince climbed off and gave the Princess a bow.
"You saved me, I owe you. No, seriously, wow."

The Princess waved politely, and rose once again
And the Pest, now defeated, bleated in vain.
And the Tupperware King ran out to see
Them disappear into the night over the lea.

From that day forward the Princess was known
As the one who defeated the Pest all alone.
The Tupperware Prince was proud to call her his friend
And the Pest learned to fight for and defend

The Princess and her kingdom and all who lived there
And their Tupperware allies, and all people everywhere.  
The Pest never once tasted human again
But was happy instead to be captured, not slain.

So if you've heard of the Pinapple Czar, 
Then you've heard of his daughter, a legend, a star
And her mighty defeat of the Tupperware Pest,
And her generous rule under the Pineapple Crest.

 

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20 Weirdly Specific Words

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There are a lot of words in the English language. Some are really common, some are really old, and some are really weird. If you Google "weird words" or "unusual" words, there are words with way too many letters, words that are super short but you've never heard of, and a variety of other weird, wacky, and fun words.

There are also dozens of lists of old words, weird words, long words, short words--pretty much anything you might be looking for.

But this list? It’s all about words that are oddly specific. Who knew we needed words for these super niche things? And yet, they exist.

1. Abecedarian

Definition: Someone who is learning the alphabet.

It’s crucial to learn the alphabet—after all, it’s the foundation of reading and writing in any language. But did you know there’s a specific word for someone who’s just starting that journey?

Enter the abecedarian, a term for anyone, especially young learners, who’s mastering the ABCs. It might sound like it belongs next to "octogenarian," but it’s actually all about the basics of literacy. Imagine: every kindergartner in the world is technically an abecedarian!

Who knew learning the alphabet deserved its own title?

Hand-drawn diagram of specific letter forms resembling V, W, X, and Y, with numbered notations and arrows. An example of oddly specific symbols in the English language, illustrating the unique shapes and meanings of specific words or letters.

This graphic even shows you how to draw the letters. Although, I didn't draw any of my letters like this ever. Just goes to show how much education changes.

2. Accubation

Definition: The practice of eating and drinking while lying down.

Probably more people do this than are willing to admit. Think about it: Netflix binges, snacks in bed, or lazy Sunday mornings with breakfast in hand—how many of us have truly mastered the art of accubation?

While it might seem like a modern indulgence, this oddly specific practice has ancient roots, with Romans and Greeks famously dining in reclined positions.

Turns out, you’re not just lounging—you’re participating in a time-honored tradition which has it’s own weirdly specific word in the English language!

I searched for grapes, and found raspberries. Yum.

I searched for grapes, and found raspberries. Yum.

3. Batrachophagous

Definition: Feeding on frogs.

While I can’t say I’ve tried it, there are certainly some batrachophagous creatures out there. My dog, for example, is a fan of frog snacks. And let’s not forget about humans—frog legs are a delicacy in some parts of the world.

So now you can impress your friends by dropping this oddly specific word at dinner! The batrachophagous diner enjoyed their deep-fried frog legs with gusto.

It appears that someone has already eaten this frog. Please go find your frog meal elsewhere.

It appears that someone has already eaten this frog. Please go find your frog meal elsewhere.

4. Brevirostrate

Definition: Having a short beak or bill.

This word might seem obscure unless you’re a bird scientist or ornithologist, but it’s perfect for describing birds with short beaks.

Even if you're not studying birds, you might find a way to slip brevirostrate into your next book—it's one of those oddly specific words that sticks in your head.

Even the brevirostrate birds would agree that the word is almost as unique as they are!

This owl is bored/not amused by your word play.

This owl is bored/not amused by your word play.

5. Chirotonsor

Definition: Barber.

Yup.

The word chirotonsor is an old-fashioned term for barber, derived from the Greek words for "hand" and "clipper."

So, technically, I guess it means "handclipper."

Next time you visit the salon or barbershop, you can impress your chirotonsor with this oddly specific word! Henceforth, all barbers and hairdressers shall be yclept "Chirotonsor of Handclippers."

Isn't this a very elegant-looking pair of scissors? I'm a fan. A Sieling fan. PUN. Also, tangent.

Isn't this a very elegant-looking pair of scissors? I'm a fan. A Sieling fan. PUN. Also, tangent.

6. Dehisce

Definition: To gape or burst open (as in a pod or a wound).

Okay, let’s be real—this word can be a bit gross, especially when it comes to wounds.

But when it refers to plants, dehisce is actually pretty cool.

Take the snapdragon plant, for example: when the pod bursts open, the seeds fly out in an almost spring-loaded fashion. It’s a perfect example of dehiscence in nature—and definitely one of the more oddly specific words for something so common in the plant world.

Who knew seed dispersal could be so epic?

Vintage illustration of a spiky star-shaped organism, showcasing the process of dehiscence or bursting open, similar to how plant pods or wounds gape. A unique depiction related to oddly specific terminology like dehisce.

Okay, so not exactly a pod or a wound, but it'll have to do. It kind of looks like it just exploded...?

7. Deltiologist

Definition: A collector of picture post cards.

If you’ve ever been fascinated by postcards, you might just be a deltiologist—someone who collects picture postcards. Whether it’s vintage travel postcards or quirky designs, this is one of those oddly specific hobbies that could easily turn into a lifelong passion.

Honestly, this is a profession I could totally get behind!

I have sent many epic postcards in my life, but none so epic as this.

I have sent many epic postcards in my life, but none so epic as this.

8. Erinaceous

Definition: Of a hedgehog family.

Ever wondered how to describe something that resembles a hedgehog? Enter the word erinaceous! While it's perfect for zoologists or fans of these spiky little creatures, I imagine there’s also a group of erinaceous aliens out there who will one day appreciate the existence of this word when they first encounter English-speaking humans.

And let’s be real—humans will need this oddly specific word too. After all, how else would we describe these hedgehog-like beings?

OMG HEDGEHOGS. IT'S PLAYING WITH AN APPLE. MOM, CAN I GET ONE?

OMG HEDGEHOGS. IT'S PLAYING WITH AN APPLE. MOM, CAN I GET ONE?

9. Estrapade

Definition: When a horse tries to get rid of its rider by bucking and kicking

Never again will you have to say, "The horse tried to rid itself of it's rider by kicking and bucking." Now you can simply say, "the horse estrapaded!"

This oddly specific word perfectly describes the bucking and kicking frenzy when a horse decides it’s done with its rider. Next time you witness a rodeo or an uncooperative horse, you’ll have the quirky vocabulary to match!

Vintage illustration of a horse in mid-buck, demonstrating the action of estrapade, the attempt to throw off its rider. An example of the oddly specific term related to horse behavior.

This horse isn't technically estrapading, as it has no rider. Instead, you can see clearly that the horse estrapaded successfully, as, well, it has no rider.

10. Favillous

Definition: Resembling ashes.

Favillous is one of those oddly specific words that you didn’t know you needed—until now. While it may seem rare to encounter things that resemble ashes, this word can describe anything from the gray, powdery remnants of a fire to soft, snowy landscapes that evoke the same ashy hue.

Whether you're describing an overcast sky or a delicate dusting of powder, favillous gives you the perfect term for that ashen look.

These are supposedly ashes from Mt. St. Helens. I'm not sure if they count as favillous though because they actually are ashes...

These are supposedly ashes from Mt. St. Helens. I'm not sure if they count as favillous though because they actually are ashes...

11. Gossypiboma

Definition: An object, such as a sponge, that is left behind after surgery.

Imagine hearing this from your doctor: "I'm sorry to say, you have a gossypiboma."

You might panic at first, but rest assured—it's just a fancy word for a sponge or object accidentally left behind after surgery.

While it’s certainly not ideal, the word itself is one of those oddly specific medical terms that sounds much more alarming than it is. So next time your doctor throws out medical jargon, you’ll have this quirky word ready!

Hopefully he won't leave this kind of sponge in after surgery or else you may have bigger problems, as in, you need a new doctor :P

Hopefully he won't leave this kind of sponge in after surgery or else you may have bigger problems, as in, you need a new doctor :P

12. Kyphorrhinos

Definition: A nose that has a hump.

Ever wondered what to call a nose with a little rise or bump on the bridge? It’s called kyphorrhinos!

Whether it’s a small curve or something a little more pronounced, now you’ve got the perfect oddly specific word for it. Imagine asking, "How’s your kyphorrhinos today, friend?"

And yes, you might have noticed the word "rhinos" hidden in there—because, just like the mighty rhinoceros, it’s all about that nose!

This guy doesn't have to worry about kyphorrhinos.

This guy doesn't have to worry about kyphorrhinos.

13. Nelipot

Definition: Someone who goes barefoot.

If you love walking around barefoot, congratulations—you’re officially a nelipot!

This oddly specific word perfectly describes anyone who prefers the feel of the ground beneath their feet, rather than shoes.

In fact, I’m tempted to add nelipot to my resume as one of my greatest accomplishments.

So, next time you’re kicking off your shoes, remember—you’re not just going barefoot, you’re embracing your inner nelipot!

Vintage footprint diagram, representing the term nelipot, which describes someone who goes barefoot. An illustration related to the oddly specific terminology for barefoot walking.

This is a foot.

Vintage footprint diagram, representing the right foot, related to the term nelipot, which refers to someone who walks barefoot. An example of the oddly specific terminology used for barefoot walking

This is also a foot.

Quite a different foot.

Quite a different foot.

14. Pogontomy

Definition: The cutting of a beard.

While I don’t personally engage in pogontomy, it’s a regular ritual in my family.

Every few weeks, when the beards start looking a bit too long or scruffy, it’s time for a round of beard trimming.

So, if you’ve got someone in your life who’s dedicated to keeping their beard in check, now you’ve got the perfect, oddly specific word to describe their grooming routine!

Black-and-white portrait of a man with a long, full beard, representing the term pogontomy, which refers to the cutting or trimming of beards. An example of specific grooming terminology
nice-shave

15. Psithurism

Definition: The sound of the wind in the trees and the rustling of leaves.

I love the word psithurism almost as much as I love the word petrichor. S

ure, you could just say "the trees rustled in the wind," but isn’t it wonderful that there’s a single word that captures the essence of this sound? While it may not be the easiest word to slip into a conversation, I’m just happy to live in a universe where a word like psithurism exists.

This is the kind of woods where I imagine the space around me is filled with psithursim.

This is the kind of woods where I imagine the space around me is filled with psithursim.

16. Qualtagh

Definition: The first person you encounter after leaving home.

This concept is truly fascinating when you think about it.

The qualtagh—the first person you meet after stepping outside—can set the tone for your entire day. If they're a thief, your plans might derail as you spend the day at the bank or DMV. On the other hand, a kind qualtagh could hand you something you dropped, saving you from the hassle of a missed errand.

Whether their interaction is pleasant, unpleasant, or neutral, that first encounter has the power to shape your mood and influence the rest of your day.

Which one of these people would you like to meet after first leaving your house? I'm thinking the lady with the goose.

Which one of these people would you like to meet after first leaving your house? I'm thinking the lady with the goose.

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17. Scolecophagus

Definition: A person who eats worms.

I know, it’s a pretty horrific concept, but believe it or not, there’s even a song about it: "Nobody loves me, everybody hates me, I’m gonna go eat worms... big fat juicy ones, itsy bitsy tiny ones, the wriggly ones that make you squirm..." You get the idea.

And while we might not have needed a word for this, here it is—scolecophagus—for all those worm-eating enthusiasts (if they exist) out there.

I agree--the picture makes it ten times worse.

I agree--the picture makes it ten times worse.

18. Tetrapyloctomy

Definition: The art of splitting a hair four ways.

Now this is a skill! Tetrapyloctomy may be an unnecessary and ridiculously specific word, but it’s also nothing short of amazing.

Whether you’re talking metaphorically about overcomplicating things or literally about splitting a hair four ways, this unnecessarily specific word has a certain charm.

It’s the kind of term that’s as hilariously niche as it is impressive—if splitting hairs was a competitive sport, this would be the gold standard.

Vintage illustration of a strand of hair, representing the term tetrapyloctomy, which refers to the art of splitting a hair four ways. An example of facetious and oddly specific terminology.

You could spend a lot of time splitting hairs if you used the hairs on this... creature. I think it might be a dog, but I'm not entirely certain.

19. Ulotrichous

Definition: Belonging to a group of people with wooly or crispy curly hair.

If you’ve got thick, curly, or even frizzy hair, you might just belong to the ulotrichous group! While I wouldn’t call my hair "crispy," it certainly has its fair share of frizz and volume.

This word is perfect for those with that signature textured hair type—so if your hair falls into the category of wooly or tightly curled, now you know there’s an oddly specific word for it.

Do you have ulotrichous hair?

This guy does look a lot like me though.

This guy does look a lot like me though.

20. Xerophagy

Definition The practice of eating dry food.

Please raise your hand if your diet consists entirely of dry food. And then write a comment or message me or email me or SOMETHING. I am SO CURIOUS about what this actually looks like (if it's real). Although, I guess my cats are on an all dry food diet. Hm.

Seems like the Canadians from Calgary are already on their way to a successful dry food diet.

Seems like the Canadians from Calgary are already on their way to a successful dry food diet.

So there you have it--my list of weird words. I love words and I love weird words. What are your favourites?

BONUS WORD

21. Grimalkin

Definition: a cat.

It literally means cat.

Derived from the word "grey" and "malkin" (which also means cat, among other things), grimalkin is a wonderfully old-fashioned way to describe our feline friends.

Personally, I like it because it sounds a lot like "gremlin," and if you’ve ever owned a cat, you know how fitting that comparison can be!

…and it certainly describes my feline friends aptly!

This cat has a quail on its head. Seems like an unfortunate position for the cat. No one wants to be the statue, if you get my meaning ;)

This cat has a quail on its head. Seems like an unfortunate position for the cat. No one wants to be the statue, if you get my meaning ;)